pwned.

YAY! YAY YAY YAY YAY YAYY

Wed, 09 May 2007 17:23:30 GMT

philly just called!
he's coming over for a sleepoverrr
it's twenty past one in the morning, but i miss hiiim.
i'm going to make him stay up til 5am with me haha
so he's tired and sleepy for uni tomorrow.
YAY YAY YAY YAY YAYYY!!

[yay]

1:11

Wed, 09 May 2007 17:14:00 GMT

i can't waaait til i have money again hahaha.
everything i am going to spend it on.
2 phone bills = $250
new camera = $500
winter coat = $200
2 x winter boots = $400
millions of pair of heels
sass & bide jeans $190
sportsgirl dresses
take kittycat out like 4 nights in a row = $200
get bulk photos developed
save for borneo
save for bali
yuck.
too much money needed and way too much to think of.
the dalai lama is right. life is so much simpler and more satisfying when it is less complicated, and when we want less.
my problem is, i want too muchh.

ohhhh shittt.

when constants aren't so constant // so what if now is all you have??

Wed, 09 May 2007 17:02:39 GMT

it's love it's love it's love
make it hurt.

i don't ever want to grow up. i don't want to be an adult with adult problems. i want to be a kid. it was so much easier when school was all to worry about. when relationships felt 'so old' but we really are just children. i don't want mine and phil's relationship to turn like adult. with real adult problems. and having to make really obscure times to see each other cos we're busy all day =[ that'd suck.
there's something so honest about trees in autumn. they're experts at letting things go.
i love that quote. walking to tegan's house the other day, with all the beautiful trees dropping their orange maple leaves. it's not like my mum says, that it makes the yards look untended. they look so lived in and real and playful and beautiful. i've always wanted to live in a neighbour like that. where trees line the long street.
i want winter clothes, but more than that, i want it to be summer again.
in summer, everyone is having fun and doing nothing every day, and you can call up any of your friends and see them.
i am soo not having my fulltime job once summer gets here. yuck.

Wed, 09 May 2007 11:12:42 GMT

we're called to hold our hands against the wounds of a broken world, to stop the bleeding.

"in the west, you have bigger homes, yet smaller families; you have endless conveniences, yet you never have any time. You can travel anywhere in the world, yet you don't bother to cross the road to meetyour neighbours; you have more food than you could possibly eat, yet that makes some people so unhappy and unhealthy."

All major religions, when understood properly, have the same potential to do good.

Violence is unpredictable, and often only causes more problems.

Buddhists are taught that if there is something you can do about a situation, you must do it immediately. But if there is nothing you can do, don't worry - that is indulgent.

Anger, is definitely not the answer. Anger prevents you from making good decisions.

it is a waste of your life to always be thinking about the next meal if you don't have to.

let the sunshine in.

Wed, 09 May 2007 11:01:47 GMT

a thousand words that you should hear
'cos you're nothing less than perfect for me
my head in my hands
our toes beneath the sand
I'd give anything to see you happy

things are getting better
just give me one more chance to say this
and we'll see what changes
a different town a different school
just promise you'll stay cool
together we will get you through this

your brilliant stare
concentrating
all eyes on you
when everything's in focus
you'll remember the one who wrote this
and you'll see
he'd do anything for you

staring at your picture I'm pretending that you're here
as the subtle silence seems to kill me
remembering the day just before you went away
how can she leave
how can she leave when there's still lots more to see

know that we are stronger
because of everything we've gone through
and I'm hung up on you
so take this drink with me tonight
I promise that you'll be all right
let me drink a dream with you

we come in doing cartwheels

Tue, 08 May 2007 07:45:52 GMT

i went to tegey's house yesterday. hadn't seen her since my birthday. i never would have thought, three years ago, that out of all the 'rockin club' members, she would be the one i'd be closest to. i probably would have thought that she wouldn't see any of us. or that she'd still be going to parties with her brothers, and not living or doing anything fun or whatever. but she's the one with me that has gone to all the leeming parties, when laura and kristen and kimberley have been to like none.
i would be so unhappy now if all i were doing these days was studying. for another 3 years. to me, that would be wasting my youth. i want to be young while i am young. and have fun and work and get money and then go travel and be young some more. and it's not my right to critisize how people live their own lives, because that's just silly but like... aunno. i would just be really unsatisfied if i only saw the same people every week and never met anyone new or exciting who has one arm or is a marine about to go to iraq, again. and i HATE people that generalise or objectify people by the five seconds of judgement they give them. i love meeting new people with different views of the world and different backgrounds and ideas and just different PEOPLE. even though like, at footy club... all the boys there, well easily 100 or the 120, are roughly the same person. they do the same things and see the same people and believe that football is a calling in life. they have no idea, nor car, about what actually goes on.
but whetever. s'if i have any say anyway.

hahaha new favourite song

Sun, 06 May 2007 09:51:21 GMT

a song written about the amazing flora and fauna that australia has to offer which should attract tourists =p

red back, funnelweb, blue ringed octopus
taipan, tigersnake, atterbox, jellyfish, stonefish
and the poison thing that lives in a shell
that spikes you when you pick it up

come to australia
you might accidentally get killed
your life's constanrtly under threat
have you been bitten yet?
you've only got three minutes left
before a massive coronary breakdown

red back, funnelweb, blue ringed octopus
taipan, tigersnake, atterbox, jellyfish, stonefish
big shark, just waiting for you to go swimming,
at bondi beach

come to australia
you might accidentally get killed
your blood is bound to be spilled
your pants are bound to get filled
because you might accidentally get killed.

did anybody see rove on jay leno last monday or tuesday night? with doctor phil?
i hope it's on youtube.... =/

freedom is just a word until you lose it.

Sat, 05 May 2007 07:31:58 GMT

//shoppingg today. got a short blue sweater dress from kookai and two gorgeousss grey knit short dress thingsss from sportsgirl. the footy club tonight. hopefully daniel will work the bar. i hope smallman comes. she's the biggest load of fun. in pants.
went into freo today to see the human battery cage. [humanbatterycage.com] it's like an organisation that protests chickens being kept in battery cages, and humans sit in like a human sized one.
we met this weird dancing scotsman last night. we were just walking down south terrace which was crowded and there was one group of people busking, like 5 of them, one with a weird metallic guitar, one guy with some pennies [or the australian equivalent lol] and chicks with weird plastic things, and this guy started dancing to the music next to cat.he was talking but we couldnt really understand or hear. then cat stopped to get money out of the atm and he was asking my opinion on which colour chair he should throw at the hippies to shut them up haha. red, blue, or yellow. i said yellow cos it's a passive colour and they won't expect it. he kept going, yellow? yellow? yellow?
bail time.

i'm gonna send a little rain your way;;

Fri, 04 May 2007 17:06:10 GMT

wednesday featured lunch with philowen @ dome. i had a giant stack of orgasm-good pancakes. wednesday night newport for the usual fun, cept it stayed open til 1 in honour of the marines docked and was even better. phil slept over and then on thursday we went for lunch @ the moon in leederville. cutest atmosphere.
went shopping with kate r & cat for thursday night, met up with adam r, luke, fergie and cossie to see spiderman 3... biggest piece of ass. i thought with the huge budget, it might have a half decent storyline or they might have employed decent writers, or make up artists that would make the actors look a little less albino. sadly, this didn't happen. the best part was stan lee's cameo, definitely, where he said something about how cool it is that one guy can change the world so much. the movie was shit but we had fun mocking it. i think cat and i fell asleep through one part and woke up and nothing much had changed. it started at 930 and finished after midnight. GGF, spiderman.
went to leach hwy, saw rhett and chris, and then luke fergs and adam came too. kelly gave us free slushies. biggest score. as we were leaving, we saw nathan and nick and they showed us the shoes they found in their ute after last tuesday night at the OBH. i was gonna claim them but got distracted.
went into freo tonight with the girls for dome ice things. dai & mickey a joined after pauls shindig in little creatures, and tom & belle came for a chat. everyone left and went with cat to newport. saw dean chappell...hooking up with elli del borello!!! she said hi and he was like eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. also saw him getting kicked out which was the funniest thing i saw aaall night. he didnt do anything wrong, he was just completely trashed and couldnt walk straight. saw julie, lee, dannaz. got bored and went into the clink. biggest mistake. ten dollar entry... its like UNDERGROUND... and there were pretty much like thirty people. worst. never making that mistake again.
hit up metros, hung with sundo jenny and gannaz for a bit, it was funny as with jenny & cat, so awkward. they were both trying to have all of sundos attention, all the time, hahaha. gannaz and i just gave up and piked.
went n stood outside hj's and watched a crazy bitch flail around on the ground and get sat on by 4 metros security guards haha and then the three hot bleck guys from wednesday came and said hey. phirrip came so i left and cat bailed after.
i have work tomo. rehhh. only for four hours from 4pm - 8 but biggestt cbf. going to footy club for this weird tshirt party where u buy a tshirt and it has like twenty squares, and 16 are beers, or cruisers or whatever, and you tick one every time u have a drink, and four are shots. not gonna bother buying the tee though. going with bree kater cat cint phirp and sundo so should be good as. dannaz is working the bar so he said he'll shout us all some.
i'm celebratiiiing that i got the job. i really didnt think i would. i answered the questions soo shitly.
but. pretty sweet. i am now employed by somewhere with a private gym!!! sweeet... thats pretty much the only reason i wanted this job haha. and for the pennies so we can save for bali & borneo.
but yer =/
i start monday the 14th.
better be ace.

find the joy engrained in every moment.

Thu, 03 May 2007 05:46:14 GMT

when i'm right, no one remembers, when i'm wrong, no one forgets.

last night was good as... punch and pie. got to freo around 930 then walked down an alley to a car park so we could drink without getting done for street drinking and we saw three random shadows coming towards and freaked, thinking they were killers haha. turned out they were only drug dealers. haha. three pretty cool guys, who offered to give us a ride home later if we needed, which was nice, not that we would have actually taken it though. it was weird, one guy was aboriginal, muk was african american, and kit was chinese. weird how none of them were white. except all the other drug dealers i know [like. two. ha] are white so it doesn't say much. they were decent guys. just with a sad profession. they kept asking if we wanted rock. we were like 'aaaaaaaaaaaah!!.. uhhh no thanks.' i was like scared to offend them.
ranywayy.
newport was kk. hung out with jim from school lots and the cute guy she was with, whose name is phil! so there's two jaimi/jayme and phil couples. hell good. danced. got groped. got shitty. elbowed some guy haha. saw daniel boone haha. hung out with tim and pj and chris a bit. lost shockingly at pool. danced with a guy in a bright red button up shirt that was pulling napolean dynamite dance moves. julie & i sexy danced on him. that was mean. and took bulk photos. i almost kicked a girl in the head when kate russells thing luke picked me up when we were dancing and took me by surprise.
i was talking to a guy for like twenty minutes before i realised he only had half of his left arm. but he was awesome. he was friends with this guy lee that cat met like 5 years ago in rotto and hung out with. both cat and i had to pretend lee was our boyfriend at one stage cos this sailor kept coming up and not getting the hint. BUT I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS A SAILOR haha. if i had, i would've danced with him! i didn't realise the americans were docked. normally when they are there's hell more.
it closed at one, phil and sundo came and picked us up. i was standing on the corner by myself waiting for him and singing put your hands up for detroit and some guy goes 'MATE... WHAT'D YOU SAY TO ME?' i was like 'uhhhh. put your hands up... put your hands up. put your hands up for detroit!' and then he goes 'i love this cityyyy'. then he came up and was like 'i'm from oklahoma. this is the most amazing place i've ever been. i have to get back on the ship in five hours and i'm looking for somewhere to chill.'
i was like 'ohhh hell cool!' then phil and sundo pulled up and were like GET IN and cat got in and i go 'uhhh we're just going back to someone's house to chill. you can come if you want?' and he's like cool. and they were like NO! so i was like come ON guys he's a sailor! he's leaving in five hours! he just wants to hang! he's going to iraq! and then he goes 'no, i've already been to iraq, and i'm going back. i'm a marine.' then i was like 'SHITTT COMEON LET HIM COME' and they were liek no and he's like 'whatever we do is fine' so i said 'uhhh me and him are gonna have sex, and that guys gonna go home, and so is that girl. then he was like 'oh. okay.'
and they made me get in the car. and phil was calling him a faggot. jerk. i slapped him upside the head twice. and screamed about how phil was a pussy and would never understand what it was like to go fight for your country and possibly have fucking five hours left to live, and they can't hang out with him for one night? they reckon he was just trying to get in my pants but who fucking cares. what else would you do if you had to leave and go to war in 5 hours? he just wanted to hang. now i'm sad again. i got really pissed at the boys for talking about what a faggot he was. fucking losers.
it was a good night. specially when detroit came on and cat and julie and me danced by ourselves with bulk people looking at us weirdly. fuckyaaaa.

the perks of being young and stupid.

Wed, 02 May 2007 10:15:58 GMT

i will breathe into your lungs.
for your heart is fierce.

leavin this town.
goodbye.

hittin the town with kitty tonight.
should be an adventure.
fuck knows how we're getting home.

sometimes life is a movie we've seen before.

Tue, 01 May 2007 12:24:53 GMT

job interview at hatch engineering today. got home so pumped. it was pretty good. alahna called me this morning and said she'd met with a few candidates and she thought i was the favourite, so the hell nervous sick feeling from my stomach went away. it was good, i could tell they liked me, even though i stuffed up some questions and they had to rephrase it so i understood haha. prolly hear on friday if i got it. but it got me thinking. when i was younger, i didnt dream the things i want now. now i just want a fun corporate job so i can buy pretty grey and black business suits and knits and cute clothes and cute heels. shit reason. so im thinking of actually going and doing nursing. since i always dreamed of one day writing, but first having an unconventional job that will let me travel eventually, so then i can write about it later.
but no one says i have to figure it out yet i guess.
i felt so good after i went looking for hot shoes i can wear hahaha but the only place i found some i liked was in mollini. they were okay in shoozbiz i guess. i'm starting to hate betts and zu. they never design anything innovative. they just wait for the new season's designs to come out and then mimic those. boring.
last night phil took me to the revolving restaraunt for dinner. it was so fun but way trippy. but so cool. but the food was sooo expensive. i had two glasses of cabernet merlot with my chicken. it was so nice. phil got the steak, i think it was the fillet.
tonight we're going to carnegies again for the tuesday thing. it's fun as, with $6 sex on the beaches.
tomorrow night my friend's band Varial is playing at the foundry AGAIN!!! [they liked them heaps last week!] so we'll go watch probly.

tonight's dinner really hit the spot. i'd so much rather go out every night, spesh weekend nights, instead of chilling like villains at someones house. it's always lame and we have to leave by 12 or 1 or 2. and its bulk overrated. really not much fun. i'd rather dance all night. it's good company but. eh. =/ i'd much rather be out with just cat tearing it up and doing the funnest random stuff. metros this saturday night with all the girls will be good. i have an 18th to go to as well but i dunno if i'll swing by.
we'll see.

get deep or die trying. so they say.

Sun, 29 Apr 2007 15:33:41 GMT

i am so in love with andrew & hayley.
there is nothing cuter than a real life totallyinlove couple.
especially when he's a fireman! ahaha
i am going to marry them.
if they don't marry each other first.
the truth is, that i've never fallen so hard.
it's taken everything in me.

i'm looking in on the good life i might be doomed never to find
without a trust or flaming fields am i too dumb to refine?
and if you'd 'a took to me like
well i'd a danced like the queen of the eyesores
and the rest of our lives would 'a fared well

i can't remember why we were friends.
i just remember how good it felt.

i won't.
be the one to disappoint you
anymore.

grace kelly // edie sedgwick // marilyn

Sun, 29 Apr 2007 14:20:31 GMT

i'm sorry
and i'm sorry i can't say it to your face.

without suffering, there is no compassion

Sun, 29 Apr 2007 13:28:02 GMT

i could listen to you sing all day long.
it wouldn't be long enough.

the world is a shithole.
or. just our society.

how come if attractive but dumb people have something to say, or unnattractive but intelligent people have something to say, the attractive person's opinion always means more. or what they have to say matters more. in my opinion, you don't get heard by anyone that matters, if you don't conform.

i would so much rather be one of those people that has no problems, because they CHOOSE to have no problems. i get along with everyone okay. i'm happy if no one imposes. i do alright. but then other people will hassle me about things they can't get over, or stuff to complain about, or they take their insecurities out on me and it fezzes with shit i don't want fezzed with. fezz you. i should stop being kind to people that end up not being at all kind to me. what's the point? they never learn. they never look back and go 'shit. i was fucking rude.' or 'shit. that was mean of me.' so. wtf.

does anyone that does not live in australia know what the word 'barrack' means?

i am so getting into footy now. greatesttt game today!!! dockers won by a point! sweeeet. greatest climax too, cos they kicked the last goal with like 40 seconds left. horrrr yerrrrrr! cat & i are gonna start going to the seaview to watch the dockers games, since it's owned by like three dockers players, and they have all the games on live, so it'll be the greatest place to celebrate after a win. but bulk places in freo i guess.

i could never cheat on phirrip owen. cos i can't lie to him. so i would have to tell him. and then i would lose him so i would lose more than he would. the end.

northbridge was okay last night. mostly boring. got a couple of hours of dancing in. then phirrip picked me up at 1230/1ish. we watched subway monkey hour. i wouldnt mind marrying tom green. i can laugh for hours with that guy. i was in a horrible upset mood with the shit that went down last night and tom green... saved myyy sense of humor.
legend.

subway monkey hour

Sat, 28 Apr 2007 16:21:53 GMT

it's not like i think about this constantly.

last nite i woke up and was hoping i could cuddle u but u werent there.

enough said. i'm done for.

we// all look// like. we feel.

Sat, 28 Apr 2007 16:08:34 GMT

i won't.
be the one.
to disappoint you.
anymore.

how do you justify doing something you didn't do?

Mon, 23 Apr 2007 17:07:28 GMT

say goodbye,
say goodbye.

it's always best just to leave it.

here comes the fallout.

didn't your mother ever tell you, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all. =//
tsk tskkk

and how the grace with which she walked into your life...

Sun, 22 Apr 2007 02:15:09 GMT

saturday night was milder than usual. cat and i had plans to go to metros, which changed to gooch's 18th, which changed to a gathering at riggy's house when he msged me at 7. so we called verno, stocked up on red bull and went. bree had a massive fight with dai so she'd wanna see if he talked to her. left, got macca's slushies, took one to cint, back to riggy's, philly came, then we picked up kates russell and smallman, and adam and alain, went back to riggy's. =/ pretty uneventful. we made the back of the couch theee place to be. haha. left around 2. bree went to see dai. cat and i went to leach hwy [again baha] at 3, and kelly was there!! so we got two cheeseburgers, a filet o fish, and TWO LARGE FRIES ANDDD two medium fries, AAAND large coke and a medium coke.. for two dollars and forty cents. we were like shittt man. we didnt expect the extra fries. we only ordered the two cheeseburger meals and the filet. kelly is frikkiin awesome. that pretty much made out night haha. went back and had d&m over our chee.burgers. i read cat's book called the bride stripped bare - was hell good. weird. but good. - while she slept, then i got into bed with her around 7 then got mum to pick me up thirty minutes latahh.
todayyy. aunno. think me and philly are going on a date.
NEXT WEEK! this friday... Massiiive road trip to kalgoorlie! me and cat and bree in one car, and dobby, dai, rory and mickey a in another car. for all of us to hang with shiggyy man. seen dog. shaunus. shauno. sheege. s-dog. my brudda from anudda mudda.
should be grand. tonight me and cat are gonna cook the girls dinner at myyyy place. alfredo [baha laziest ever] and garlic chicken and kebabs. i'm salivating now.

the usual suspects.

daimy you jerk. the back of that couch was pure love.

alain and adam werent even invitedddd baha =\\
cat's face pretty much says gettt fuckeddd

i made my bed today.
for the first time in 2007.

in my opinion, the opposite of love, is really indifference. apathy.

writing is another form of revenge.

i have a feeling that inside you somewhere,
there's somebody that nobody knows about.

ohhh the fakeness of some.

Sat, 21 Apr 2007 03:51:56 GMT

lastt night was fletch's 18th. at john connell reserve again. it was awesome fun, an amazing huge group of people, mostly leeming kids of course but also bulk winthrop kids,and the hot somerville kids, and the cool all saints kids. for the FOURTH party in a row at john connell, i have not seen mia smoker all night, until i got to the bathroom and she is in there. hahaha and it's a reunion. then we go chill on the dance floor. weirdest thing. she is ALWAYS in the toilet. it was great fun, i got ready with cat, kate russell and greta at russells, with vodka jellyyyyyy. hit up the party around 9. derro old men manning the door. funny as. danceeeddd with mel tang and timmy and rodzy. had an awesome d&m with brett sprigg. made prank phone calls from the kitchen with catie and sarah and mel - those girls are crazy. had some coneees with cat matt and giles. i was talking to sprigg bulkk. ohh and daneeka and kk!! and jess sardelic whop havent seen since primary school, and morgan. rory kept trying to get me to dance with him through the black songs i don't like. GGF roiieehh!! it was hell bad, there were BULKK fights. there's like steps, five steps, like bleachers kinda, but concrete and they go along one side of the whole reserve. and are about two feet wide. one guy, wasd getting bashed by like THIRTY PEOPLE, he got kicked onto the stairs then down to the next level then rolled down and down and down and i was hell scared at the time but now its kinda funny. cat smoked too much weed and mass vomiting ensued. the cops came at 11... worst ever, bulk of them too. there were so many fights. kate smallman came to pick us up at 12 and the cops werre yelling at her to fuck off and go away. there were fights like up against her car. aaaaargh.
great party though lol. before all the fights.
ewww sharna's sister was aaall over dobson. mickey a and i sat there taking the piss... the girl is like thirteen, and could barely stand up.... now THAT'S classy... and how to get the attention of the guy you like....
wench.
cat was throwing up sooo much, i had to wipe the slag off her lip with my hand and support her all the way to the carpark, but she couldnt even stand up for like thirty minutes. then she was slouched over in the car for another thirty. then we got her in smallmans car finally and warpdrop and i walked to russells cos philly bailed earlier with sundo and doesnt like wardrop so didnt want him to sleep over hee.got to russellsss, watch secret garden hahaha. cat was passed out. then we watched tad hamilton. i fell asleep from 3, woke up at 4, got into bed with cat, woke her up, so then we were talking and laughing for an hour when she realised how funny and feral shed been. and all the funny shit she'd done. wardrop and catty and i spooned for a while with the sheep. they fell asleep around 6. i played snake on cats phone til 720 lmao then got up with gret and went on myspaace. everyone got up around 9, wardrop left for footy, we went to john connell to get kate's car, had brekkie, went out the back and sunbathed and i am hooomeee.
tonightttt. i think we;re going to gooch's 18th. it'll be lame, prolly. oh well. if it gets boring, we'll pull out the spice rack and shove spices in the kettle etcetc.

one day i'll fail to breathe, and all you'll have are memories.

Wed, 18 Apr 2007 18:39:16 GMT

From the words that carve our lives to the words that take us by surprise

great song.
THESE ARE THE THINGS I THINK ABOUT
WHEN I'M ALONE WITHOUT YOU:::
i wonder of your whereabouts
and hope like hell,
you're happy where you are.

i wonder when i will burrow my forehead to your neck next,
smell the vague scent of ralph lauren polo, and inhale deeply.

the way you always arrange and lift the covers for me,
when we're snuggling in bed,
so that i have just enough blanket to be warm with you,
but just enough so that i have to cuddle you.

the way you never mind, that i'll say no to food,
but then pick it all off your plate piece by piece.
you even give me all the good chicken.

if memory serves, i'm addicted to you,
and pretty much everything you do.

i'm addicted to leaning across the console,
every single time we stop at a red light
just to give you a kiss. quick... or not so quick.

i'm addicted to the look in your eyes,
that you get, whenever i'm totally completely happy.
and you know it, and i know you know it,
and you get totally completely happy too.

i must be living the good life.
to see a real look of pure, unadulterated love.
and know it doesn't come often.

i'm far from a romantic.
i'm more of a cynic.
i believe that real love comes very few, and extremely far between.
but when i really think i'm experiencing it,
i know not to take it for granted.
because i doubt that anyone experiences it very often.

i hope we can stay this way forever.

i'm trying to find out if my words have any meaning.
my memory lacks all but initiative.
i'm tired and hungry and totally useless.

being bored was never better.

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 16:29:16 GMT

it took a world of trouble
it took a world of tears
it took a long time,
to get back here.

gotta love tom petty.

last night philly picked me up to go to his for monday night dinner's. my favourite of the whooole week. i love his mum. she always cooks something with chicken in it on monday night because she knows i like chicken hahaha =) on sunday night, she wrote philly a note saying "phillip, ask jayme to come over for tea tomorrow, we are having chicken kiev, love mum" haha!
we had dinner, then watched the melbourne comedy festival gala because it is seriously one of the best nights of the whole year. after dinner, philly had a huge inspiration to get out this cute movie Drop Dead Fred that i've never seen, so we drove around to three different video stores. in one, they didn't have it, in the second, it was missing, and in the third it was rented out. so we got out sister act 2 because we love it. then sundo came over and watched it with us, even though at the start he kept telling us how gay it was, but he laughed through the whole thing.
my auntie is going to the hospital for chemo tomorrow, so i get to watch my cousins all day!!! i've missed them so bad, i haven't seen them in far too long. i hope we have fun.

this entry is so cheesy and silly hahaha

like the old cd of my parents' that i found and decided to upload.
long live the seekerrrsss and their crappy cover songs.
slow downn, you move too fast
you gotta make the morning last
doop doo doo, feelin groovy!

until. you hold my hand.

Tue, 17 Apr 2007 16:10:07 GMT

i'm sick of the things i do when i'm nervous.
this stupid thing always comforts me.
you are everything i want.
cos you are everything i'm not.

- i just enjoyed that way too much -
and didn't want it to end.
i'm confused.
what does it mean???

it's hard to be a good friend sometimes. you want to but you really just don't know how. you've hit a roadblock and you can't figure out how to go around it.

-

i think she's lying to herself. i don't understand it. sometimes fear can really paralyse you. and if someone you love doesn't understand that, it makes it worse.

-

i think she likes to think that we're worse than we are, so she can feel better about being shit at what she does and about not being there and about not being able to be who we need. but i mean - she thinks we don't do our half??? where the hell were all the 'how was your day?'s. i ALWAYS asked her.

but whose fault is it that she doesn't know much? mine or hers.
a combined effort i suppose. i don't open up enough as i should.
but she's the reason. she never taught me how. she's a closed book unless she's angry.

-
i like going out so much so that i don't have to be here when she's here. she doesn't start a civil conversation. just complains and starts an argument.

-

i don't want to go out anymore in case i miss him. i want to talk to him again.

-

when you only have one friend in the world, losing that friend would seem like the absolute scariest thing in the world.

weeping willow,
with your branches running down
why do you always weep and frown?
is it because he left you one day?
is it because he could not stay?
he found shelter in your shade
you thought his laughter, would never fade.
weeping willow,
stop your tears,
for there is something to calm your fears.
you thought death would rip you forever apart
but i know he'll always, be in your heart.

what seperates us from animals?
our ability to freely feel and control our emotions.

how laid back do you guys wanna be??? your emergency number. 000 ??? it's like... OH.... OH OH!!!

i'm far too unstable to settle, i doubt that the doctors are wrong...

i MISS

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 14:29:01 GMT

seen doggie. all the way back in kalgoorlie. YUCK! who wants to be there =P it's certainly no jamaica. or no perth. what kind of silly place has no beach???
.......
yerrrr thats what i thought.
last night was really just too much fun. king's cup. riley and caleb playing nonstop on their guitars, all the good songs ever written. getting cheeseburgers as SOON as we got there. [thank fucking god that a mcdonalds had been built. haha. last time we had to make do with RANKKK!! wok in a box, and whoppers in the morning, which made me feel sickkk]. wishing on a shooting star out the back with philly. watching riley try to jump off the balcony... [shaun told him there was a pool underneath].
bitching about schools and finding chips with tally. chicken schnitzeling roiiehh at the beach hahaha. waking up this morning and running down to the beach with russell again, swimming and doing aerobics on the sandd haha while the locals did their 'WTFFF' faces. ohhh!!! sliding down the stairs on couch cushions with courtney! haha. we had more success just sliding down on our bums. braiding shauns hair, even though there is barely anyyyy to plait. jumping around to fedde le grand with jacinta. running upstairs with riley nicki and caleb every time reel big fish came on hahaha.
baileyyys and ice chips. nicesttt! bulkk garlic bread. THE MAGAZINE AD, it says "WE ALWAYS WANT TO SHINE. BUT WE NEVER WANT TO SHINE." sitting there with russell ripping up all the words and making weird as fuckk sentences. WE ALWAYS SHINE. BUT WE NEVER WANT. or ALWAYS WE SHINE BUT NEVER WE SHINE. and bullshiiiittt.
ohh the head massages. niiiicesttt. i love bree vernon.

so visceral.

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 05:15:00 GMT

i want to thank you for being a part of my forget-me-nots and marigolds, and other things that don't get old.

awesome weekend. thursday night, hung with shaun sundo and dobson at philly's. friday night had the boys and girls over. well pretty much just me cat and smallman and russell went to this crazy funny party then got really bored so we came back to mine and had phil; shaun; dobson; mickey A; rory; dai; caleb; riley; nicki s; anddd costa over. hilarious. riley is fucking insane. caleb was lapdancing dobson.... most disgusting thing i've ever seen. riley was eating a packed lunch, like watermelon and salad, and kept trying to kiss shaun until dobson said he could kiss him instead. so he did. rehhhhh. weirdest kid. yesterday was ToTALLy LyK OMGZZZZ DAA BomBBB. haha. went to the dobsonnn mansion in mandree for the night withhhh. everyone. mreee phirripp cat rory katerussell dai bree jacinta shaun dobson mickeyA nickiS riley caleb rigby courtney luke and tally.
more of the same fun stuff from last time, cept riley and caleb were there so it was crazy weird. the house sleeps 11, withhhh ummmm prolly 4 more on the couches. soooo it was a squeeze. bree wanted time alone with dai cos they hadnt for ages, so she called ahead and demanded the bed that they had last time, which is one of three couples beds, but its downstairs, and its the only bedroom downstairs. so then rory was like FUCKKK NOO and riley and caleb had bvoth already stripped down to boxers for comfort and were on pills so phirrip and rory said that caleb and riley whould get naked and look like theyve passed out on bree and dai's bed to see how pissed bree got. it was cute asss, she laughed and then was like aaarghhh and then was laughing her ass off. pretty much everyone was. because riley was half on top of cleb, and cleb had his balls between his legs. rehhh. it was better without riley and cleb. theyre funny but. their fun is weird as.
cat and kate fiunally got there around 9, cooked lasagne, we sat down and ate it was helll good. sat up on the balcony and talked, played circle of death, danced bulkk, filmed all weird stuff. at one point shaun dai bree and me were up on the balcony when riley dercided to go home. all the boys except philly anddd rigby and luke were on pills so they were all pingin, and riley was on so much crap, so he was trying to reverse nicki's car on the front lawn with 6 other cars around it, and he backed into phils car twice, and almost bree's, and we were all bulkk yelling at him and telling him to calm down and not be gay and come inside, when the guy from across the road came out and asked riley what hed had to drink and stuff and was talking to the boys and we were yelling at them to come inside cos it was like philly and dobson and riley and nicki and they were all fucked. anyway. they were talking for like ten minutes but it felt like thirty, and then suddenly philly was like 'THE GUY RECKONS HE'S A COP AND RECKONS HE'S EX-SAS AND IS GOING TO GET HIS GUN AND HIS DOG', but up on the balcony we could see his house, and it was funny cos he was just peeking through the curtains the whole time after he went back inside. i think he was a good guy, he was just trying to make riley not leave because we were all yelling and stuff, so he knew obviously that it would be bad if riley left. also, it was a really nice night, yet riley had turned the windscreen wipers on so obviously he wasnt right to drive.
it was a pretty good night i spose. bree kate cat and i went down the beach sat on a table and talked, and this loser came up on a scooter, ON THE BEACH, and was like 'you girls here for the party? where is it?' we were making hell mean mandurah jokes. like, there were five people standing by the toilet block, so we were like 'SHIIITTT THIS PARTY'S HUGE!! BIGGER THAN LAST TIME! THERE WERE SIX PEOPLE AND WE WERE FOUR OF THEM'. it was soo funny. he thought we were there for the party or whatever. s'if. we said we were jsut staying at our friends or whatever but he kept asking dumb questions. he finalyyyyy pissed off when four inbreds came up and like same thing. we asked if they were in school or tafe or whatever and one guy goes 'nah. i own my own businbess. i clean toilets.' hhahahah cat was bulk mocking him and then we asked two of them their names and they go 'brad and luke' so kate and i, for some reaosn i dont remember why =S started going BRAD LUKE BRADF LUKE BRAD LUEK LUKE LUKE BRAD LUKE BRAD LUKE BRAD, BRAD LUKE LUKE BRAD LUKE BRAD LUKE BRAD BRAD LUKE really fast for like twenty seconds. then we ran home cos they were weird and annoying and kept thinking we were there for the NON EXISTENT PARTY.
go away, mandurah inbreds.
ohhh BAAAHAA
i rememeber.
the guy goes. 'i'm not a mandurah inbred. i', from tasmania'.
CUE BULK LAUGHTER. he was dead serious too.
i had a funnn d & m out the back with tally and courtney.
the fish alarm was back
me kate and courtney jumped on rigbys bed and made him wake up
me and cat had a shiower together again
shaun and jacinta hooked up aieeeee
d&m with bree and cat in bree & dai's bed, then dai and rory too. funny stories about i cant remmeber what now.
watched the western derby, like 7 of us werew dockers fan, and only rory and rigby were going eagles but rory had snorted bulkkk rankk x so he was hyper and annoying and screaming GOALZYY whenever they kicked a goal. wtf. ggf rory haa.
HEY RORY?? DO YOU COME FROM HEAD?
yeh!!! i was born there!!! HOW'D YOU KNOW I CAME FROM PORT HEDLAND?
there were like no beds and philly and i gave our bed to rig and court cos i said i wasnt gonnna sleep anyway, so philly dragged a mattress out to the back lawn and slept, cos he was too hot in the house, and then i sat outside with him for a qwghile around 3 and ate my alfredo, and cat ran out and had some alfred and talked to us and then said 'make love, love makers. you kids are the defintion of love.' and i saidddd 'narr you and me are the defintion of best friends' and then her whole face lit up because she is so cute like rthat hahaha
and she kept coming back and stealing my alfred.
MY ALFRED.
i put on a 90's aerobics video and was doing the low impact workout at 4am downstairs, buti woke up russell and cleb hahah and they started laughign their asses off as soon as. then rory wouldnt stop caling me aerobics queen. i tqaught him some moooves.
cat and me and rory were the last ones up, but they finally went to bed around 6 and then i went out the back with philly and gave cuszhies. cuddles. only.... he made a funny word for it. we love our cuszchies. aunno how the hell to spell it. then the sprinklers came on hashahaha and we had to pull the mattress up higher,. then at 6.30, CLOSER sprinklers came on haha. so we ran inside. philkly weas talking in his sleep again and saying funny things. like he woke up and goes 'BABE!!! NO ONE ELSE HAS LOOKED FOR IT AS HARD AS I HAVE!" and i knew not to bother waking him up to laugh at him cos he kind offf issss awake when he talks he's just... dead haha. so i said 'WHERE IS IT?' and he said underneath you. and i said 'WHAT IS IT?" and he goes 'sex'.
yerrr phirriy that makes sense.
it's raining.
shank yaa.
mandree was bulk fun again as expecteddd
but now shauns going back to kalgoorlie for 3 weeks =(
SUCKSSSSS.
kalgoorlie is laaame a shithooole. but we're gonna on a road trip up there andf see him soon
sweeetttt-uh.